Love's A Peach: Atlanta's Relationship Blog

Notable and Quotable

2007-12-20T11:33:00.001-05:00

"An archeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her."

-Agatha Christie

Peachy Date Ideas

2007-12-14T12:37:00.001-05:00

Wondering how you and your beau should ring in the New Year (or the weeks very soon thereafter)? Check out http://www.cheaperthanhotels.co.uk/ and get your travel on. Its time to do it big in '08. South Beach, wack. Los Angeles, done that. Vegas, been there. Try Prague, London, and Spain on for size.

Upgrade yourself, you won't regret it. Overseas travel is uber romantic and gives you a sense of culture thats unmatched in the US. http://www.cheaperthanhotels.co.uk/ has great deals on last minute travel, group travel, and general travel information.

Theres actually a special for travel in the next 21 days...what are you waiting for...get some overseas love in your life. http://www.cheaperthanhotels.co.uk/

ATL Celebrilove: Nivea and The Dream Divorce

2007-12-11T14:08:00.000-05:00

First of all, who knew they were married. Her statement, while needing some grammatical correction, is nice and doesn't deliver any low blows. I'm sure their divorce was another filled with sex, lies, and groupie love.

In a statement to the press, Nivea responded to the divorce from her husband,

I am also sorry to have to report the news of our separation. It is however a mutual decision for the both of us. We see this as an attempt to try and maintain the friendship we've developed since our marriage and also to allow growth for myself as well as him. Unfortunately I was not prepared for partnership or even real life for that matter. I am completely and truly grateful and thankful to God for sending him into my life and to him for everything that he has done for me and my family and that includes monetarily as well as spiritually and mentally, especially for myself, which was never his responsibility in the first place. None of you are aware of the real me and I plan to make that as clear as possible on this next album. I come from a sad and scary past that I am still in the process of overcoming and growing past, thanks to the man I love and always will. This is truly the only person I've ever known or heard of that is incredibly loving, passionate, wise, psychic, wise, creative, genius, and many more things that I could never put into words. I don't feel it is fair for neither of us, especially him, to continue this never-ending battle of the minds that he and i have continued for long enough. I want nothing more than for him and I to be happy. His happiness is all i want, for I could never repay him for what he has endured by being my friend, partner, and husband.

ATL Celebrilove: Monicko

2007-12-11T13:56:00.000-05:00

So, it looks like there may be trouble in paradise for ATL's very own Monicko (Monica and Rocko). While she's at home preggers w/ their second child, he's out promoting his latest single and shooting videos. Thats a good thing, right, he's working. Where the problem lies, it what he's doing with all his free time. Click on the link below to read what a bunch of ATL women have to say about how he doesnt really love Monica and how he's creeping w/ a PYT. If its true, then she's fallen into the trap--another beautiful and succesful Atlanta woman, settling for a piece of trash.

And who came up with the name Rocko da don...doesn't there already exist another da don---I think I like Polow better.

http://www.themostaccess.com/2007/11/26/rocko-da-don-to-shoot-new-video-in-atl/

Notable and Quotable

2007-12-11T13:54:00.000-05:00

"To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore to love is to suffer, not to love is to suffer. To suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy then is to suffer. But suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore, to be unhappy one must love, or love to suffer, or suffer from too much happiness. I hope you're getting this down."

-Woody Allen

Featured Articles: Interesting Reads

2007-12-11T13:51:00.001-05:00

Would you take back a cheating mate? http://msn.match.com/msn/article.aspx?articleid=8988&TrackingID=516165&BannerID=541888&menuid=6&GT1=10678

Is he too close to his ex? http://msn.match.com/msn/article.aspx?articleid=8977&TrackingID=516165&BannerID=541888&menuid=6&GT1=10678

Is your mate cheating...20 signs he/she is. http://msn.match.com/msn/article.aspx?articleid=8934&TrackingID=516165&BannerID=541888&menuid=6&GT1=10678

ATL Celebrilove: Urshmeka Speaks

2007-12-06T17:22:00.000-05:00

The meka of Urshmeka spoke out in a recent article in Essence saying that if she was mixed, light skinned, or other, people would like her better for Usher. She goes on to say that so what she's not a size 2 or 25 years old...they are in love. Chic has a point. I dont know her personally, so I cant speak on whether or not I like her, their situation just seems a little weird to me. She's old and has dozens of kids, and he's gayish...let me stop before Ursh shuts down this site (you know he's done it before to his own fansite) And based on Usher's previous taste, she doesnt fit the "Chile" mold. But what Meka doesnt realize is that not many of us are losing any sleep over whether she and Usher belong togehter, most of us couldnt really give a hot damn and actually do care more about those on the streets in ATL and Darfur. We only speak up when she thrusts herself into the limelight as she often does. So calm down Meka...no one really cares.

Here's the quote:

“We (black women) don’t like ourselves. If I were Hispanic, Usher would have the sexiest wife alive. If I were mixed, he’d have the sexiest wife alive. “But he has a black girl, and it’s like, ‘She’s horrible and she’s ugly!’ “OK, maybe I don’t fit the cookie-cutter standard - 25 and a size two - but this is who he loves.” “There are women getting raped in Darfur, young girls being turned out every single day right here in Atlanta. We have bigger issues to worry about than two people in love with each other.”

Notable and Quotable

2007-12-06T13:57:00.000-05:00

"Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience."

-Samuel Johnson

True Story: Couple Gives Back

2007-12-06T13:56:00.000-05:00

Its nice to see a couple take time away from themselves to make a difference in someone else's life...how about you and yours try it this season!

http://www.ajc.com/living/content/living/stories/2007/12/05/goodworks_1206.html

True Story: Jackpot

2007-12-06T13:53:00.001-05:00

http://www.ajc.com/metro/content/metro/atlanta/stories/2007/12/05/lottery_1206_web.html

Atlanta "family" man wins big...someone's having a very merry Christmas!

Notable and Quotable

2007-12-03T10:25:00.000-05:00

"I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox."
-Woody Allen

Lesson Learned: I'm not for everyone.

2007-11-29T12:18:00.002-05:00

There's a partner at my law firm who is smart, rich, attractive, pushing 40 and still single. Most would consider her a great catch, but for some reason, she's not married, or even dating for that matter. I initially chalked it up to her being too focused on her career to give married life a try and being too set in her ways to open up and date different types of men. However, in a conversation we had yesterday, she told me that she's single and happy. She's single because, as she put it, "I'm not for everyone. And I'm ok with that." Her statement caught me by surprise, but the more I think about it, the more I like it.

We have to realize that some of us are too smart, too strong, too blessed, too anointed, and too favored to be with certain people. It doesn't make us any better than the men we try to date, just different. God made us unique for a reason and we have to realize and embrace the fact that we aren't for just any ol' guy. We are for the equally yoked, strong, supportive, loving, mature brothers of the world. So if you are alone or in an unhappy and unfulfilled relationship, say it proud, "I'm not for everyone" and wait patiently until God is finished making the man for you.

Notable and Quotable

2007-11-29T12:18:00.001-05:00

"The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What... does a woman want?"
-Freud

Notable and Quotable

2007-11-28T11:39:00.000-05:00

"There is a place you can touch a woman that will drive her crazy. Her heart."
-Melanie Griffith

ATL Celebrilove: Urshmeka Delivers

2007-11-27T17:32:00.000-05:00

The blogosphere is reporting that Urshmeka delivered a baby boy last night here in Atlanta. Hopefully all is well w/ the "Happy" family.

ATL Celebrilove: Well, Kinda

2007-11-27T11:34:00.000-05:00

So, Dottie is preggers. We aren't sure whether the father is Jackson from Pittsburgh or Ali from Jacksonville. Either way, she'll be preggers for the next 2 years....

http://www.ajc.com/news/content/living/stories/2007/11/19/elephant_1120.html

Love Dont Live Here Anymore: More Weeks/Bynum Drama

2007-11-27T11:31:00.000-05:00

Lets get this divorce over with already...

http://www.ajc.com/metro/content/metro/gwinnett/stories/2007/11/26/bynum_1127.html

ATL Celebrilove: Dirty Awards Edition

2007-11-27T11:25:00.000-05:00

Not many couple sightings last night on the red carpet at the Dirty Awards....Aside from Diamond and Lil Scrappy walking the carpet as an item, the most interesting news was that Diamond is no longer a member of Crime Mob. I know, who cares?!?

(Pic courtesy of SandraRose.com)

Notable and Quotable

2007-11-27T10:10:00.000-05:00

"Its better to trust and later find out that he was not trustworthy, than to not trust, but later found out that he was."-Unknown

Off My Chest

2007-11-21T10:09:00.001-05:00

From a friend...

Thanksgiving is tomorrow. I can already smell the turkey, yams, mac and cheese, pies, and sweet tea....with all that food, you'd think I'd be so full. But no, I'm empty. I'm starving and slowly wasting away. I've been relying on your words and your follow through to sustain me. I've been eating off your love and devotion. But all that is so empty. I'm starving because I've eaten all the lies you've fed me. You've lied about it all--the money, the cars, the credentials, the commitment. But you know what, dont blame yourself---I should have broken up with you a long time ago.

Upcoming Events For You and Yours

2007-11-20T15:08:00.000-05:00

Make it a post-Thanksgiving Shopping Date...Head on Up to the North Georgia Premium Outlets at Midnight on Thanksgiving for some great deals and some holiday cheer...besides, you'll need to burn some calories by then anyway!

http://www.premiumoutlets.com/outlets/sales.asp?id=16

Then go see the premier of the Holiday movie, "This Christmas" With an up and coming cast its sure to entertain and get you in the holiday spirit.

http://www.sonypictures.com/movies/thischristmas/

Featured Articles: A Little Too Much Love In this Family

2007-11-20T15:00:00.000-05:00

It would suck to find out that your uncle is your father...for some reason, when I saw "Atlanta Megachurch" I hoped it wasn't Eddie Long they were talking about!

http://www.ajc.com/dekalb/content/metro/dekalb/stories/2007/11/20/church_1120.html?cxntlid=homepage_tab_newstab

ATL Celebrilove: Shoulder Leanin' When I See You

2007-11-15T09:23:00.000-05:00

`Well I'll be! The blogosphere is confirming that Yung Dro and Fantasia are indeed a couple and that she may even be pregnant. I'll admit that they are an interesting pair together--I think I kinda like it. Both seem about as real as you can get. Looks like Dro dropped his petite little light skinned girlfriend...or maybe he still keeps her on the side...who knows...

It'll be interesting to see how this plays out.

Featured Articles: "I Dont Do Teenagers"

2007-11-13T13:38:00.000-05:00

This morning on the Frank and Wanda morning show, Frank told of a caller--a single mom who was raising her son alone. When she got to her wits end because of his behavior she called his father and said that she thought the son should live with him. The father said he'd talk it over with his new wife. Well, the new wife said, sorry boo, i dont do teenagers!

Things brings up a whole host of issues:

1) Should you get into a relationship with a man that has preexisting children if you cannot handle the thought of one day raising them.
2) Can you truly love a man if you cant accept his children?
3) That father was a father to that son before he was a husband to the new wife, should he have asked her if the kid could come and stay, or should he have merely informed her he was coming?
4) Will that son truly be happy in a home in which he's not wanted
5) Since when do moms get mad at their sons and drop them off at someone else's house to live permanently?

I can see all three sides to this story...BUT they need to have a good old cosby style family meeting to get over the mom's weakness, the dad's cowardly approach, and the step mom's selfishness.

Notable and Quotable

2007-11-13T13:35:00.000-05:00

Love simply cannot spring up without that self-surrender to each other. If either withholds the self, love cannot exist. --Dr. E. Stanley Jones

Featured Articles: Pucker Up

2007-11-05T17:52:00.000-05:00

Want some tricks to becoming a better kisser? Check out this read:

http://msn.match.com/msn/article.aspx?articleid=8955&TrackingID=516165&BannerID=541888&menuid=6&GT1=10582

ATL Celebrilove: Fiddy and CiCi

2007-11-05T11:51:00.000-05:00

Below is what the Mirror is reporting about 50 Cent and how he helped Ciara celebrate her recent birthday.

"50 Cent is plane smitten..
VIP THE WORLD MUSIC AWARDS in Monte Carlo

You can't accuse 50 Cent of not being a romantic at heart. The rapper chartered a jet full of presents for his singer girlfriend Ciara's 22nd birthday.
Fiddy filled the plane with thousands of pounds worth of goodies, including fresh rose petals, teddy bears, candles and chocolates from a Dublin cake shop, and had it flown to the World Music Awards in Monte Carlo.
He also told 3am that he would treat her to 22 birthday parties at various exotic locations around the world.
Talk about keen."

ATL Celebrilove: DISSmissed

2007-11-01T10:04:00.000-04:00

If you need a primer on some of the latest relationship gossip....

Bobby Brown dissed his former J.O. (Jump Off) Superhead on Ryan Cameron's show yesterday...see Sandrarose.com for audio
Bow Wow is supposedly planning to lace an upcoming track w/ some subtle disses on ex-Ciara...see mediatakeout.com

Notable and Quotable

2007-11-01T10:03:00.000-04:00

Three things of life that are most valuable -Love, self-confidence & friends.
~ Unknown ~

Featured Articles: SEX

2007-10-30T15:30:00.000-04:00

I found this post on another website earlier...its one mans view of sex outside of his marriage...Its sad and disturbing, and scary...and probably true...damn

"Ask yourself: what's wrong with a little sex on the side (health risks aside). Most people would agree that we'd all be happier if we had it more often. I'm sorry of this offends anyone- but for people who expect to get married and only have sex with the spouse for ever, well, that's terribly arrogant in my view. I think I am reasonably skilled a sex after my 36 years- but I know that sometimes the fire gets a little lower (read as "boring") for me and my spouse. I can tell you that I quietly get some elsewhere when I need to and I suspect very strongly that "she" (my spouse) does too. We don't discuss it, we are both adults and I can tell you that I am crazy about my spouse. I would lose my mind if I was ever alone with out her. My feelings in this area have not a single thing to do with sex.
I know women are very tortured by this. I have heard this subject come up a lot with women over the years and I don't expect my few paragraphs to be a revelation to anyone; but I hope it's a little helpful to some worried women out there.
Don't worry. It's just sex. Be smart and see the larger picture."

Notable and Quotable

2007-10-30T15:27:00.000-04:00

"What the eyes don't see, the heart doesn't feel."

-Unknown

2007-10-26T11:52:00.001-04:00

OFF TO SEE LOVE AT ITS FINEST THIS WEEKEND AT A WEDDING...POSTS WILL RESUME ON MONDAY (UNLESS THERE'S SOME GOOD DIRT TO SHARE BEFORE THEN)

Lesson Learned: Why Did I Get Married?

2007-10-25T16:32:00.000-04:00

If you haven't seen Why Did I Get Married? Stop reading and go see it. If you have seen it, read on...

This movie easily sparks discussion about some of the problems we face in our African American marriages, how we try to fix them, and how we really should be fixing them. Any one who has seen the movie knows that the best scene is the "put it all out on the table" dinner scene. I laughed, I cried, I laughed, I got mad, and I cried some more.

What we can learn from these couples: (w/o giving too much of the story lines away in case those who havent seen it didnt heed my warning above)

Tyler Perry and His Workaholic Lawyer Wife: Its so easy for black women to fall into this trap. We strive so hard to overcome boundaries and to shatter glass ceilings that we devote all of ourselves to our careers. This woman actually had a "good" man, but she couldn't see that because she was blinded by making partner and meeting her billable hour requirements. What she failed to realize was that her daughter and her husband needed her far more than that law firm. If she died tomorrow, her office would stay empty for a few weeks , but the firm would move on w/o much heartbreak. Her husband and daughter however, would have an empty place in their hearts and their homes forever. Lesson learned: Keep your career in balance. Never let it outweigh family and friends. The greatest blessing we have our these relationships. Dont sacrifice yours for corporate America---I promise, Corporate America will make no sacrifices for you.

Janet Jackson and Malik Yoba: As a counselor herself, Janet and her movie hubby seemed to have things pretty much together. They knew how to communicate, and thats key. Where they fell short was being honest and forgiving. They shared their deepest hurts w/ friends rather than each other and smiled at and ignored pain to keep from feeling it. Lesson learned: Pain thats kept in will eat you alive. Own up to your mistakes and make a plan to move past them. When hurt by a partner, discuss it. Not speaking about the elephant in the room is not fair to you, your spouse, or the elephant.

The Drunk and her STD infected hubby: This couple looks like lots of couples in Atlanta. The wife makes more money than the husband so she feels that she wears the pants. The husband tries to get ahead but feels that he is being knocked down by his own wife. They lie to each other, disrespect each other, and cheat on each other....a recipe for divorce and disease. Lesson Learned: Women, no matter how many bills you pay in your household, if you want your man to stand up and be a man, you have to treat him like one. if you cant handle making more than him then dont be with him--but degrading and putting him down will only keep you both behind. Men--have a plan. Just because she makes more than you now, doesnt mean it always has to be that way. Exercise your manliness in other ways, for instance, leading family prayer, or starting a business. Dont let infidelity be your way of lashing out at your partner. Communicate, dont fornicate. And lastly, KEEP YO BABY MAMAS IN CHECK.

Jill Scott and Her AssHole Husband: This story continued to bring me to tears throughout the film. Jill played a role of inferiority and dependence. She depended on her husband for everything from money to her own self worth and happiness. Its easy to let a man's view of you shape how you see yourself. Lesson learned: if you dont love you, no one else will. if youre not happy w/ the way you look, then change what you can and accept what you cannot. if your man is not happy w/ the way you look...drop him.

Featured Articles

2007-10-25T15:28:00.001-04:00

Want to know how you and your mate could grow closer after infidelity?

Read on:
http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/21433484/?GT1=10450

Off My Chest: Bridezillas Beware

2007-10-25T14:53:00.000-04:00

With the popularity of wedding websites and shows, the phenomenon of becoming a Bridezilla is taking over. I actually think many women anxiously await the opportunity to throw hissy fits, scream, fuss, and miss important dates in others lives while all the while blaming it on being a Bridezilla. Call me a hater if you want, but honey, that is not a good look. First and foremost, don't get it twisted. It was cute the first time you said, "I'm getting married and youre not." But the next 4 times made you sound like a 5 year old. Not everyone rushes into marriage after 3 months...sorry if me and mine are laying a rock solid foundation first. Secondly, don't get a big head. The rock, or shall I say pebble, on your finger, does not make you any hotter, cuter, or smarter than before you had it. Diamond possession does not make you an expert on all things wedding nor all things class. Poll a dozen people and I promise you we will all agree that going to the club after tying the knot is not really all that classy. Finally, you should be prohibited from exhibiting bridezilla behaviors if your wedding costs less than $20,000. Bridezilla tactics should be reserved for the platinum wedding type. By platinum, I really mean over $100,000 (hey, i'll give semi-platinum types a break too $20-$100K) When you've prepared a 5 course meal for your guests, Tiffany gifts for your bridal party, and are wearing a jewel encrusted Vera Wang gown, I"ll be a little more understanding of your tirades. However, when I've spent more on your wedding than you have, I wont be so understanding. People work 50 hour weeks and have mortgages, car notes, and lives that do not revolve around your wedding. I'll be there when I get there, I'll help you when I can, and I'll leave when I damn well feel like it. Your bitching, moaning, screaming, and complaining is for the birds. Keep it up and I know one bridezilla who's gonna be broke and begging for friends after this day is over.

Notable and Quotable

2007-10-24T11:21:00.001-04:00

"Like the measles, love is most dangerous when it comes late in life."
-Lord Byron

Featured Articles: Ugly Ducklings

2007-10-23T12:09:00.001-04:00

So, according to a study discussed in the AJC today, ATLiens are not an attractive bunch of people...

Are we really that ugly?
By AJC Tuesday, October 23, 2007, 08:05 AM
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
The website Travelandleisure.com and CNN Headline News have released the results of an online poll of travelers and residents on what they like (and don’t like) about 25 large cities in the United States, and Atlanta is not going to be happy with the results.
There are many different categories, and we do better in some than in others, but what jumped out was that we rank 23rd out of 25 cities for people-watching, and 19th out of 25 for attractiveness of the natives.

I will point out that the note above discusses attractiveness of natives...hmmm...glad I'm a transplant:)

ATL Celebrilove: Straight Gossip

2007-10-23T09:39:00.000-04:00

Mediatakeout is reporting that Fantasia and Young Dro are dating these days...hmmm...me no think so. I"ve seen Dro's type, and its not Fantasia...plus I've met his girlfriend and she's a cutie. No Haps Tasia.

True Story

2007-10-18T10:21:00.000-04:00

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/12784368/?GT1=10450

Woman sues florist for 400K for providing the wrong color flowers....Bridezilla at its finest.

True Story

2007-10-18T10:17:00.000-04:00

Read this article about a man and woman sticking together to raise a family and fight breast cancer at the same time.

http://www.ajc.com/health/content/health/stories/2007/10/17/beverly_1018.html?cxntlid=homepage_tab_newstab

Keep them in your prayers!

Notable and Quotable

2007-10-18T10:14:00.001-04:00

The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread.
~Mother Teresa

Notable and Quotable

2007-10-17T10:37:00.001-04:00

"Where there is love, there is God also."
~ Leo Tolstoy ~

Featured Articles

2007-10-16T11:42:00.000-04:00

Why having a little Desperate Housewive's in ya can be a good thing...

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21256467/?GT1=10450

Notable and Quotable

2007-10-16T11:00:00.000-04:00

MAKE LOVE, NOT WAR!

Pics of TIPs Big Thangs Poppin'

ATL Celebrilove: Locked Up...An Update

2007-10-15T18:29:00.000-04:00

TI remains in federal custody as his bond was denied at least until Friday's hearing. As if this drama couldnt get any more interesting, sources close to the duo are reporting that Tiny is pregnant again. Congrats on that...but why the weed and ecstacy in your possession?

I guess we can only wish them all the best for the sake of the 19 children that are involved in the madness.

Featured Articles: The Guy's Rules.

2007-10-15T18:17:00.000-04:00

(Thanks Rae)

1. Men are NOT mind readers. 1. Learn to work the toilet seat.You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.We need it up, you need it down.You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.Let it be.1. Shopping is NOT a sport.And no, we are never going to think of it that way.1. Crying is blackmail.1. Ask for what you want.Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work!Strong hints do not work!Obvious hints do not work!Just say it!1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.1. If you won't dress like the Victoria 's Secret girls, don't e XPE ct us to act like soap opera guys.1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.Don't ask us.1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of them makes you sad or angry, then we meant the other one 1. You can either ask us to d o S omethingOr tell us how you want it done.Not both.If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.1. ALL men see in only 16 colo Urs, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.1. If it itches, it will be scratched.We do that.1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle, besides we know you will bring it up again later.1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want t o hear. 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really. 1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as BASEBALL , FOOTBALL, or golf.1. You have enough clothes.1. You have too many shoes. 1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!1. Thank you for reading this.Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Peachy Date Ideas: Why Did I Get Married

2007-10-15T18:05:00.000-04:00

Although I havent seen it yet, word on the street (and by that I mean ST:) is that Tyler Perry's new flick is a must see. Its like therapy for your relationship. Grab your beau and hit the theater...I'll be doing the same.

Off My Chest/Lesson Learned: The Bend Factor

2007-10-15T17:43:00.000-04:00

Everyone hates to do things that they don't want to do. That's a well known and accepted fact. What distinguishes the selfish from the rest of society is that those who can take the focus off of themselves at times, will do things that they really don't want to do for those that they love. Why? Because the person we love, loves doing whatever it is that he/she has asked us to do. So because we love them, we love it...at least every so often.

I'm not talking about yielding to your significant other's desires every waking moment of your life, but instead, on occasion, putting their needs before your own...besides, seeing a loving smile on their face from doing that which makes them happy, should make you happy. Call it bending, give or take, compromise...call it what you want, but it takes a lot of it to make a relationship a lasting one.

Don't be quick to overstate the bending that you do. You may think your as limber as they come, always bending over backwards to please your mate, but when it comes down to naming those things you do for his/her sole benefit ...your list comes up short. As a significant other you are a pillar of strength in your partner's life. He/she needs you. What they say is true. If you're not taking care of the needs of your mate, dont you worry because someone else or something else will be. Whether its another man or woman, his or her job, friends, or family, travelling, the strip club or alcohol, someone or something can quickly fill the void that you leave in your significant other's heart. Like B says, dont' ever get to thinking you're irreplaceable.

This is not to say that you should bend for your mate out of fear that he or she will cheat on you..because if thats all it takes then maybe you dont need that mate anyway. But this is to say that the energy you give out will be the energy you receive. This is so much bigger than tic for tac. If you give out selfishness, stubbornness, and coldness to the universe, thats exactly what you'll receive. You may not receive it from your mate--he or she is hopefully smart enough not to miss their own blessings by playing the 2 wrongs make a right game with you. But just because your mate is still cooking for you, cleaning for you and smiling with you...doesnt mean the universe is not ricocheting that treatment.

If you ever look out and you start to wonder why your friends have backstabbed you, why your parents have distanced themselves, why the job hasnt come through, why your account doesnt look like it should, why your body is in pain, why your mind is so stressed..take a step back and look at how you're treating the ones who love you most.

Bending for our mates is how we exercise our love. Get your relationship in shape..before its too late.

Notable and Quotable

2007-10-15T14:17:00.001-04:00

"What you focus on .... is."
-Bre Dennis

Featured Articles

2007-10-15T12:10:00.000-04:00

http://dating.personals.yahoo.com/singles/datingtips/16758/11-things-women-dont-know-about-men

Check out the above link to learn 11 things about men that you may not have known....

Lesson Learned: Say a Prayer

2007-10-15T11:33:00.000-04:00

Tired of arguing with your mate? Cried all that you can cry? Said all that you can say? Its easy to make up superficially, but what about the hurtful words that cut you deep, the pain you're harbouring in your heart.

Try saying this love prayer with your partner. A couple that prays together, stays together...

"Lord, help us remember that our love for each other reflects your love for us. May we empower one another to fulfill our purpose in life. May our love be an example for our friends and a model for all. May our experience as a couple give us a preview of the oneness we will experience someday. Help us to see that everything is either love or a call for love. Help us to celebrate our similarities and honor our differences. Help us to transcend our limitations and utilize our talents. Thank you for this opportunity, this life and for my loving partner. Amen."

ATL Celebrilove: Locked Up

2007-10-15T10:02:00.000-04:00

What a weekend for ATL Celebs..both good and bad. In case you've been living under a rock...our very own Bonnie and Clyde were locked up on Saturday for attempting to take possession of unregistered machine guns...yes, Tiny too. Although, she was released at some point this weekend.

The pic shows Tiny being cuffed and placed on the curb. The guy in the red shirt is C Rod of PSC. Allegedly Mac boney and Dro were also arrested. Tiny was charged with possession of marijuana and ecstasy pills.

pic courtesy of concreteloop and splash news

I'll reserve comment for later...no actually, I'll speak on it now. I'm sick of all these gossip sites ridin' for Tip. Sure, he's innocent until proven guilty, but if he is guilty then he deserves to do the time for the crime. Stop putting hip hop artists on such a pedestal that they can do no wrong. They can, and they often do. I strongly believe the accusations are true. If he doesnt go down for it, well thats what good money and good lawyers do for you.

Featured Articles

2007-10-11T10:19:00.000-04:00

A somewhat cocky Polow da Don dishes with the AJC about work and relationships...

http://www.accessatlanta.com/music/content/music/stories/2007/10/11/betfive_1011.html

Notable and Quotable

2007-10-11T10:08:00.001-04:00

"Between husband and wife there should be no secrets from one another. I have a very high opinion of the marriage tie. I hold that husband and wife merge in each other. They are one in two or two in one."

Mahatma Ghandi

ATL Celebrilove

2007-10-10T17:43:00.000-04:00

Although Diddy makes a lot of babies, he sure makes some cute ones...Check out one of his and Kim Porter's twin girls getting ready to swipe an AMEX.

Featured Articles: Happy Couples

2007-10-10T13:12:00.000-04:00

Need to know the secrets of a happy couple? Well, they include sex, breaks, romance, and fair fighting...

http://msn.chemistry.com/msnarticles/WhatsTheirSecret?trackingid=508259&bannerid=2002324&GT1=10486

Featured Articles

2007-10-10T10:41:00.000-04:00

For even more confessions of a video vixen, the AJC checked in with Karrine...

http://www.accessatlanta.com/music/content/music/stories/2007/10/09/bet_1010.html

Been There Done That

2007-10-10T10:37:00.001-04:00

Words from the Wise...

Ahh! Uwh! Ouch! Okay! Mmm? All the sounds of someone who has "been there-done that. Lifes situations come to greet us and the former sounds become our responses. My learning is that we act rather then respond as not to miss lifes opportunities. Timing and opportunity are related. Don't miss your opportunity to experience life at it's fullest....your "been there-done that" season.

Notable and Quotable

2007-10-10T10:35:00.000-04:00

"Don't ever stop dating your wife, and Don't ever stop flirting with your husband."
-Pastor Kochel

Featured Articles: Liar Liar

2007-10-09T16:54:00.000-04:00

For those who think that relationships should be built on the truth (myself included) here's an article detailing when white lies may actually help your bond.

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/21110828/?GT1=10450

Peachy Date Ideas

2007-10-09T10:46:00.000-04:00

Need an over the top date idea...take your beau on a destination New Years Eve trip. It's the perfect time for a sweet blend of partying and romance. With just 2 months before the big day...start planning now. Hot spots to ring in New Years Eve include NYC, Miami, Vegas, LA, London, or any snow topped mountain.

Get your travel on.

Notable and Quotable

2007-10-09T10:41:00.000-04:00

"To the world you may be just one person, but to one person you may be the world."
-Unknown.

Notable and Quotable

2007-10-08T10:21:00.001-04:00

"Love is merely madness..." --William Shakespeare

2007-10-05T13:41:00.000-04:00

Hello lovers and friends...im travelling until Sunday...posts will resume as normal then and I'll be launching the new column..."been there done that."

Off My Chest

2007-10-03T09:31:00.000-04:00

If you listened to the Frank and Wanda morning show today maybe you were as disgusted as I was. The "scrupples" discussion of the day was spawned by RayJs book to be released claiming that he's slept with over 1100 women. Thats not a type-o...ELEVEN HUNDRED. When did numbers like this become impressive? Is he some sex symbol or "sex machine" now? No, he's more likely to be an STD-infested whore. I'm so not impressed by this behavior. And lets not forget the double standard. While many men will tout him for being such a sexual guru, when Supahead or any other female comes out to say the same thing, she's immediately a ho. Lets try to get these numbers down ladies and gentleman. When you can no longer count your sexual partners on both your hands and toes (and thats giving you some leeway) it may be time to take a sabbatical. By the time your spouse gets you you'll be as riden as a 1967 Chevy.

ATL Celebrilove: Keyzy

2007-10-03T09:23:00.000-04:00

Despite breakup rumors, Keyshia Cole attended Jeezys D-list bday party last weekend. They don't look too in love, maybe the breakup rumors are true. Evidently the bandaid and scratches Jeezy's rockin' are a result of a car accident he had earlier that night. If thats true, thank goodness he's ok. (For more pics see ybf.blogspot.com)

Notable and Quotable

2007-10-03T09:18:00.000-04:00

"The Love Bird is 100% faithful to his mate, as long as they are locked together in the same cage."

-Will Cuppy

Featured Articles: BackSlidin'

2007-10-02T18:10:00.000-04:00

Thinkin' about going back to your ex...read this first.

http://msn.match.com/msn/article.aspx?articleid=5920&TrackingID=523934&BannerID=566942&menuid=6&GT1=10486

Upcoming Events for You and Yours

2007-10-02T13:36:00.000-04:00

A few upcoming events to be aware of:

Mike Epps and Rickey Smiley are at the Fox this weekend (Sat. and Sun. shows on sale) See Ticketmaster.com

R. Kelly will be in concert with Keyshia Cole and J. Holiday on Nov. 15th at Philips Arena. Tickets go on sale Friday.

Letter to My Ex: Soup's Engagement

2007-10-02T13:33:00.000-04:00

Dear "Soup",

If your latest relationship status update on facebook is correct, then I should be congratulating you on your recent engagement. You are actually the first of my exes to get engaged. While some would expect that I'd "feel some type of way" about that, I really don't.

Our relationship was a weird one, and in fact, you were the weird one. From your style to your "preferences" I never really figured you out. You were never sure if you were ready to commit and I finally grew tired of your yo-yoing me around.

We did have some great times partying together. (I still thank God that he brought me through those holidays in the tri state area). Your friends were my friends and I also take pride in the fact that before me you were damn near an atheist but immediately after me you got baptized. (Snaps for me bringing souls to Christ!).

You tried to rekindle a few years later, but I never really wanted to go down that road with you again. Based on the man I'm in love with today, I don’t really see why I was ever so attracted to you. Maybe it was just a freshman phase.

Anyhoo, I checked out the pics of your fiance, and, well…shes "cuterish." Kind of like Usher going from Chile to Tameka..a slight downgrade, but hey, if you like her, I love her. No hard feelings, in fact, no feelings at all. Maybe this means I never really loved you as anything more than just a friend. Best of luck in married life. Don't worry about sending me an invitation, I think I'm busy on your wedding day.

Two Fingers.

Featured Articles: The Science Behind Meaningless Sex

2007-10-02T09:23:00.001-04:00

So as if there isn't a need to develop a cure for AIDS and cancer and everything us that ails our community, researchers decided to research the "friends with benefits" relationship...or as we call it around here, being a splack.

http://www.ajc.com/health/content/health/stories/2007/10/01/sexfriends.html

Notable and Quotable

2007-10-02T09:11:00.000-04:00

"Gravitation cannot be held responsible for people falling in love."
-Albert Einstein

Notable and Quotable

2007-10-01T09:41:00.000-04:00

Love, true love, is that which can give the mostwithout asking or demanding anything in return.
~ Mazie Hammond ~

Lesson Learned: From sexy splack to super serious

2007-09-29T23:19:00.000-04:00

I'd like to pose a question to the masses. Can you move from just having no strings attached sex with someone to having a true and respectable friendship? Can a jump off turn into a client, business partner, confidant, and friend?

Part of me thinks no. That once you've given yourself to a person sexually without demanding any more in return that at least for a woman, the man will never truly respect you and place you on the pedestal on which you should be. He'll always see you as his "splack" despite your intelligence, drive, and capacity for true friendship.

On the other hand, we are all adults. People come into our lives for reasons and seasons. Maybe we are all smart enough to use multiple parts of our brains and separate the business side of a person from the pleasure side of a person. Even though he may have been a friend with benefits, maybe he has a greater purpose to play in your life later on. Maybe you shouldnt foreclose those opportunities.

Despite the true answer, i think its important to set clear boundaries if you are now trying to do business or build a friendship with someone you used to "mess" with. Maybe you need to disappear for a while. End the creeping, disappear, and come back more professional than ever. Maybe he or she will see you in a new light. Communication is also key. Talk about your new relationship and how the days of old are gone. When in doubt, never go down that road with someone with whom you hope to establish a more lasting connection with. The chances that he'll take you seriously after smackin' your behind in a love making session is slim to none.

2007-09-28T22:11:00.002-04:00

When I said the smart get the hell out of dodge during weekends like this in ATL, I wasnt playing....travelling for the weekend, posts will resume as normal on Monday (unless I find steady internet access here before then)

Notable and Quotable

2007-09-28T22:11:00.001-04:00

"Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them?"
-Abraham Lincoln

Featured Articles: Spoofem

2007-09-28T22:06:00.000-04:00

Sandra Rose first reported about a new device that allows you to not only mask your number when calling someone but to show a different number. Do you think your ex is still communicating with his ex, well get her number and make it show up on his id when you call...see if he answers with a sound of confusion or will a sound of comfort...interesting.

www.spoofem.com

ATL Celebrilove: Bonnie and Clyde Edition

2007-09-27T13:45:00.000-04:00

Clyde held his Bday party in the ATL last night w/ other September babies Weezy and Jeezy. Here's a pic of the "3 the hard way" crew and Bonnie. I wonder what the heck she's thinking...

Upcoming Events/Lesson Learned: Atlanta Football Classic

2007-09-27T10:55:00.000-04:00

We all know that this weekend Fam U takes on TSU right here in the ATL. In the midst of all the pigskin, step shows, job fairs, health screenings and parades, there will be an influx of college aged boppers and wanna be show stoppers infiltrating our streets and parties. Be safe out there. Remember that real estate agents come a dime a dozen around here, video hoeing is not modeling, and just because he says he plays football, he doesnt' necessarily mean the NFL. Don't get duped ladies and gentlemen. The good is that maybe there really will be 100 black men in Atlanta this weekend. The bad is that weekends like this tend to bring out all the fake and phony that Atlanta has to offer. If you're smart you'll hit up a few lounges but will leave Esso and Compound to those people who are yet to have a mortgage and a car in their name. If you're smarter...well, you're getting the hell out of dodge.

Enjoy!

ATL Celebrilove: Home of the Braves

2007-09-27T10:51:00.000-04:00

Check out Braves player Andruw Jones, his wife and son and their Duluth home in this recent AJC article:

http://www.ajc.com/business/content/business/private/stories/2007/09/26/pqajones2_0930.html?cxntlid=homepage_tab_newstab

Notable and Quotable

2007-09-27T10:44:00.000-04:00

"A blessed thing it is for any man or woman to have a friend, one human soul whom we can trust utterly, who knows the best and worst of us, and who loves us in spite of all our faults. "
-Charles Kingsley

Notable and Quotable

2007-09-26T10:06:00.000-04:00

"Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage."
-Anais Nin

Please Read!!!!! Missing Chicago Woman

2007-09-25T12:33:00.000-04:00

Although this blog is dedicated to love and relationships in Atlanta, sometimes national emergencies are far more important. Please spread the word and most importantly pray for this sister in Chicago.

True Story: Chivalry's Not Dead--Puzzling Proposal and Mi Kidney Es Su Kidney

2007-09-25T10:06:00.002-04:00

ATL Men, here's a neat proposal idea:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070924/ap_on_fe_st/odd_crossword_proposal

and talk about true love and compatibility at its finest...
http://www.ajc.com/living/content/living/stories/2007/09/24/real_0926.html

Notable and Quotable

2007-09-25T10:06:00.001-04:00

With Atlanta's Murder Rate being up by 22% the notable and quotable for today is simple, make love, not war!

Lesson Learned: Family Ties

2007-09-24T17:17:00.000-04:00

In the intensity of getting to know a significant other we often neglect getting to know their families. This is a huge mistake. The family that raised, taught, and nurtured your beau is so important to who he/she is and who he/she will be with you. Not only does taking an interest in your signif other's family show him or her that you truly are interested in loving them on a deeper level, but it allows you to learn more about why he does what he does, acts how he acts, and says what he says.

Ever wondered why your girlfriend never says the words I love you but acts like she does? Maybe her dad never told her, but chose to show her in other ways. Does it bother you that your boyfriend doesn't hug and isn't all that affectionate? Maybe he and his mom have that same kind of "hands off" but loving relationship. Just because you and your family do things one way doesn't mean that another family's way of doing things is wrong. Spending time with the family will both teach and strengthen. Its not about making a good impression (although that's a plus) its about making an informed decision.

There's nothing better than loving every part of your man, his mother included. So whether its for Christmas, or just for Sunday football, head on out to see the fam...you won't regret it. . . (besides, if your boo won't introduce you to the fam, well, you've got other problems on your hands)!

Notable and Quotable

2007-09-24T09:56:00.000-04:00

"I never knew how to worship until I knew how to love."
-Henry Ward Beecher

ATL Celebrilove: Gabby and Luda?!?!

2007-09-24T09:49:00.000-04:00

The blogosphere has been reporting for weeks now that Gabrielle Union and Ludacris are an item. They have been spotted all around the US recently getting quite cozy. The daily dish is now reporting:

A Beautiful Union for Ludacris?
Sexy actress Gabrielle Union has a new hip-hop honey in the shape of birthday boy Ludacris.
The rapper, who recently turned 30, and the "Bad Boys II" star have been dating for the last two months, according to friends.
The new romance is Union's first serious fling since she split from husband Chris Howard in 2005.
Union, 34, was the rapper's special guest at his recent birthday party, which he held at Cafe Martorano at the Rio hotel in Las Vegas on September 7.
A source who attended the exclusive party tells In Touch Weekly magazine, "They were openly affectionate."

They could be a cute couple. That is if she stays outta the streets just a tad. I think Im still a fan of Luda's baby mama who is a self supporting Attorney. Here they are even pictured with his mom (pre braid cut off)

ATL Celebrilove: Hmmmmm....

2007-09-21T09:17:00.000-04:00

Urshmeka was spotted out and about. She just doesn't look 7 month preggers to me. Bigger than Usher yes, but 7 months preggers, no.

Notable and Quotable

2007-09-21T09:08:00.000-04:00

"Lucky is the man who is the first love of a woman,but luckier is the woman who is the last love of a man."
~ Unknown ~

Featured Articles: Your Horoscope

2007-09-20T11:00:00.001-04:00

Check out what the stars are saying about your love life ...
http://astrocenter.astrology.msn.com/msn/DeptLove.aspx?returnURL=DeptLoveToday&sign=&s1=&s2=&Af=-1000

Notable and Quotable

2007-09-20T09:59:00.000-04:00

You have to walk carefully in the beginning of love; the running across fields into your lover's arms can only come later when you're sure they won't laugh if you trip.
~Jonathan Carroll

ATL Celebrilove: Diddy Comin' Out The Pocket

2007-09-20T09:53:00.000-04:00

Word on the blogosphere is that Diddy is in ATL today to determine the amount of child support he'll have to pay for his 1 year old daughter by his 2nd Atlanta baby mama. Spies are predicting that Sarah Chapman will get about $25K per month. Baaallliiin'

Lesson Learned: I am Woman, Hear Me Roar!

2007-09-19T15:25:00.000-04:00

Today is one of those monumental days in my life. Those who know me by name rather than moniker know what I did. It reminds me that being a woman is about so many things. Its about being a nurturer but also looking out for self. About being a mother, but also a wife. Being weak, but also being strong. Being YBFSP (Young, black, fabulous, successful, and professional) in Atlanta is a beautiful thing. We strike those balances better than any other women I know. Be proud of being a woman in Atlanta. You can do it all, see it all, and be it all. We own our own homes and cars and have lucrative careers. More importantly we are grounded and faithful (well some of us) to our families, our men, and our people. So continue to thank God and tell those trying to keep you in place to get off the road, because here we come! (and I mean that oh so literally:)

Featured Articles: Cheating on your Man, With your Man!

2007-09-19T09:21:00.000-04:00

When keepin' it real goes wrong on the internet...

http://www.metro.co.uk/news/article.html?in_article_id=66504&in_page_id=34

i HEART atlanta

2007-09-19T09:13:00.000-04:00

i HEART atlanta because African American productions like Women of Brewster's place come around quite frequently.

While the ending left a little to be desired for me, I recommend going to see it at Alliance Theater while its here until Sept. 20. I promise that as a woman of color you will see a piece of yourself in at least one (if not all) of the women of that infamous housing project. From the oversexed Eta Mae, to the comforting and faithful Mattie, their struggles and spirits resonate in us all. We are lucky to live in a city where African American productions such as this come to inspire and uplift. Support it and don't take it for granted. Grab your girlfriends and some tissue and get ready to watch a piece of you on stage.

www.alliancetheater.org

Notable and Quotable

2007-09-19T09:12:00.000-04:00

"Don't hold in your tears, that's how we drown. Letting the tears flow washes away the pain."
-Mattie, Women of Brewster's Place

Notable and Quotable

2007-09-18T10:14:00.000-04:00

"Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go."
-Herman Hesse

ATL Celebrilove: Urshmeka

2007-09-17T16:27:00.000-04:00

Usher caught up with AJC folks last week and chatted a bit about life and love. He described this year as tumultuous. Hmmm, either Ursh doesn't fully understand what the word means or he knows exactly what he's doing when he describes his marriage to Tameka, birth of his first child, and losing mom as manager as "highly agitated; distraught; turbulent" (from dictionary.com) Marrying Tameka would agitate me too. He did go on to say, "But I'm so happy about my marriage and my child on the way." (I'm sorry but tumultuous and happy just don't go together) While he does know the sex of the child, he won't tell just yet. As for rumors of him selling his Alpharetta home, he explained, "Oh I'm not leaving...I think I'll always be an Atlantan."

Love's A Peach: Atlanta's Relationship Blog

Notable and Quotable

Peachy Date Ideas

ATL Celebrilove: Nivea and The Dream Divorce

ATL Celebrilove: Monicko

Notable and Quotable

Featured Articles: Interesting Reads

ATL Celebrilove: Urshmeka Speaks

Notable and Quotable

True Story: Couple Gives Back

True Story: Jackpot

Notable and Quotable

Lesson Learned: I'm not for everyone.

Notable and Quotable

Notable and Quotable

ATL Celebrilove: Urshmeka Delivers

ATL Celebrilove: Well, Kinda

Love Dont Live Here Anymore: More Weeks/Bynum Drama

ATL Celebrilove: Dirty Awards Edition

Notable and Quotable

Off My Chest

Upcoming Events For You and Yours

Featured Articles: A Little Too Much Love In this Family

ATL Celebrilove: Shoulder Leanin' When I See You

Featured Articles: "I Dont Do Teenagers"

Notable and Quotable

Featured Articles: Pucker Up

ATL Celebrilove: Fiddy and CiCi

Featured Articles: What We Argue About

ATL Celebrilove: DISSmissed

Notable and Quotable

Featured Articles: SEX

Notable and Quotable

Lesson Learned: Why Did I Get Married?

Featured Articles

Off My Chest: Bridezillas Beware

Notable and Quotable

Featured Articles: Ugly Ducklings

ATL Celebrilove: Straight Gossip

True Story

True Story

Notable and Quotable

Notable and Quotable

Featured Articles

Notable and Quotable

ATL Celebrilove: Locked Up...An Update

Featured Articles: The Guy's Rules.

Peachy Date Ideas: Why Did I Get Married

Off My Chest/Lesson Learned: The Bend Factor

Notable and Quotable

Featured Articles

Lesson Learned: Say a Prayer

ATL Celebrilove: Locked Up

Featured Articles

Notable and Quotable

ATL Celebrilove

Featured Articles: Happy Couples

Featured Articles

Been There Done That

Notable and Quotable

Featured Articles: Liar Liar

Peachy Date Ideas

Notable and Quotable

Notable and Quotable

Off My Chest

ATL Celebrilove: Keyzy

Notable and Quotable

Featured Articles: BackSlidin'

Upcoming Events for You and Yours

Letter to My Ex: Soup's Engagement

Featured Articles: The Science Behind Meaningless Sex

Notable and Quotable

Notable and Quotable

Lesson Learned: From sexy splack to super serious

Notable and Quotable

Featured Articles: Spoofem

ATL Celebrilove: Bonnie and Clyde Edition

Upcoming Events/Lesson Learned: Atlanta Football Classic

ATL Celebrilove: Home of the Braves

Notable and Quotable